Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Please Say A Prayer

A friend of mine, Cyndi, just emailed me and several of our friends asking for prayers for her friend, Anna.

Tragically, Anna lost her 15 month old son today. He died in his sleep while at the sitter's house. I don't know Anna but my heart breaks for her right now. Oh, how I wish I understood God's plans. How I wish I knew the plans He has in store for Anna. How I wish I could explain it all to her.

But there is nothing that can be said or done to wash away the pain that Anna and her husband are feeling right now. Nothing to make her say, "Oh, I feel better now. Thanks".

It's just not possible. Only God can mend her broken heart. Only God can heal her pain. Only God can get her through to the other side.

Months ago, the Holy Spirit kept me awake with a writing. He does this from time to time and I'm often compelled to get out of bed, go to my computer and type out whatever it is the Holy Spirit wants me to say. But this time was different. What the Holy Spirit was dictating to me didn't make sense to me because it didn't apply to me so I stayed in bed and somehow managed to fall asleep anyway, never typing a word.

I get it now. Here is the story Holy Spirit was telling me:

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I am a birth mother.

You may have friends that have adopted children and you've probably heard them say many times how thankful they are to the birth mother. These women, the birth mothers, have given them the one amazing and precious gift that is second only to the gift of salvation - the gift of a child.

Birth mothers give their children to the only other person who could possibly love them as much as they do, if not more.

Birth mothers give their children to the only other person who could possibly provide more for them. Teach them a little better. Heal them a little more tenderly. Forgive them a little more gracefully. Accept them a little more completely.

Birth mothers give their children to the only other person willing to die for them.

I am a birth mother.

I gave birth to a beautiful baby but, not long after, the Lord took him home to live with Him.

I got in some kisses and some hugs but not nearly enough. I took a few pictures, played a few games but not nearly enough. I carved out some memories and stored up some love, but not nearly enough.

Then my child went to live in his new home with his new parent, his Heavenly Father. The Lord has His reasons - this I understand.

But not nearly enough.

I am a birth mother. My child was adopted into God's family and the Lord will raise him now. I could give my child so much, but the Lord will give him more.

I love my child immeasurably, but the Lord will love him beyond that.

I would've forgiven my child after everything, but the Lord forgives before.

I wouldn't have died in the place of my child, but the Lord already did.

I am a birth mother.

The Lord did not promise me a child to begin with but He gave me one anyway. The Lord did not promise me an indefinite amount of time with my child, but I got some anyway. The Lord did not promise me a life without pain, but I got some joy anyway. But there's is one thing the Lord has promised me and that is a reunion.

And I will live the rest of my days longing for it, for I am a birth mother.

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Please pray for Anna and her family. I know you've never met her & don't know her last name but God will know who you are talking about. Pray the Lord will heal her and her family and bring them through to the other side, together. Thank you.

1 comment:

Jamie {See Jamie blog} said...

My heart breaks for her. She'll be in my prayers.